I have decided to put away my bras and let the girls flop freely for their last days on my body. I know what you are thinking, why would I be so nice to my boobs after they turned on my and shacked up with cancer? What can I say, I am a giver.
It is not like I will be jumping on a trampoline or anything. More mundane activities like grocery shopping for broccoli and other healthy stuff I used to think only hamsters ate. Seriously, in my ‘better late than never’ attempt to feed my body better, I have eaten more broccoli in the past week than the law should allow. Just ask my dogs. Even the pit bulls can’t handle being in my vicinity for too long and those dogs are usually the culprits that clear a room.
Along with the broccoli, I get to sample delicacies like raw almonds, lemon juice, baking soda and raw apple cider vinegar. Trust me, you have not lived until you have turned yourself in to a human science project and drink lemon juice with baking soda followed by an apple cider vinegar chaser. Remember those volcanoes kids used to make in high school? What a ridiculously odd sensation feeling that erupt in your gut. Blech.
All of this is with the hopes to raise my pH. Right now it is very low, probably due to the fact my diet used to be based on Lay’s potato chips and Diet Coke. And bacon. I miss bacon.
Appointment with the plastic surgeon today….