If all goes according to plan, in 24 hours I will be in the recovery room and my breasts will be in the trash. I am still feeling good, ready to start this fight. Every once in awhile my mind wanders and I start thinking of the gory details but I am trying to not focus on that.
My son Tommy surprised me yesterday. I told him he did not need to fly home to be here for the big event. He ignored me. It is so nice to have my family with me right now. Tonight we will have a nice family dinner with both my sisters joining us. I am so grateful for my sister, Suzanne, interrupting her very busy schedule to come up from So Cal for moral support. I am so blessed.
Tomorrows festivities will begin with a procedure at 10 AM that has something to do with dye, a big needle and my lymph nodes. Actually it starts 2 hours before that when I have to apply special ointment to my boob (my surgeon referenced frosting a cake. I miss cake). I have to liberally apply this special numbing goo all over my left breast and then cover it with Cling Wrap. I have no idea why this makes me laugh every time I think about it but it does. Then I get to have the dye procedure done. When that is over I go to the hospital and check in. Surgery is at 1pm.
Surgery is expected to take several hours and then an hour in recovery. I should be settled in a regular room by 7. I will try to post an update tomorrow night.
Thank you for all of the support and well wishes. I truly appreciate it.
Thank you Laurie for the lovely handmade hat!
I am actually looking forward to my hair falling out just so I can rock this hat!
I am so blessed to have so many amazing friends. I was treated to a delicious lunch, a lot of laughs, stories and a little beer. I even scored gifts! This whole breast cancer thing is not too bad…
Thank you all!
5 more days until surgery or as I now refer to it, Makeover day.
Who would have ever thought I would be going to a plastic surgeon? Not me! I felt like a fish out of water. It is a sad day when you are more comfortable going to an oncologist than a plastic surgeon.
Now that I was rubbing elbows with the beautiful people I really wished I had dressed for the occasion. Somehow my comfy sweats and pink shirt seem tacky.
I am ushered to a exam room and instructed to put on the gown. By now I am well aware that the opening goes in the front. The surgeon walks in and says “Hello Mrs Ghilotti, advanced stage breast cancer” I tell him he can call me Genevieve. Being referred to as Advanced Stage Breast Cancer kinda freaks me out. Then he gets down to describing the surgery complete with a magic marker and my boob as the canvas. After a few minutes of coloring he starts going in to detail about the nitty gritty of slicing and dicing. I cut him off reassuring him that I am fine with just knowing he has done this kind of thing before and hopefully I will be asleep during the surgery and he won’t be needing me to assist.
Next, he takes photos. He says I don’t need to smile. I smiled anyway.
Now we start looking at new parts for my breasts. He tells me I have a lot of flesh and I am fairly certain that is an insult but I am still smiling. Then he reminds me that I will no longer have breasts, I will have mounds. They will look like breasts under a sweater but when I look at myself naked in the mirror they will just be mounds. I stopped him right there. Told him in no uncertain terms do I ever look at myself naked in the mirror! If I have successfully avoided doing that for the last 15 years why on earth would I start looking when I have mounds? After that I tuned him out and started day dreaming about Almond Joys.
He tells me my weight might make the surgery/recovery more difficult. I wished I had eaten broccoli before my appointment so I could make him as uncomfortable as he was making me. I stopped smiling.
My makeover (OK, double mastectomy) is scheduled for Monday, Feb 11.
I have decided to put away my bras and let the girls flop freely for their last days on my body. I know what you are thinking, why would I be so nice to my boobs after they turned on my and shacked up with cancer? What can I say, I am a giver.
It is not like I will be jumping on a trampoline or anything. More mundane activities like grocery shopping for broccoli and other healthy stuff I used to think only hamsters ate. Seriously, in my ‘better late than never’ attempt to feed my body better, I have eaten more broccoli in the past week than the law should allow. Just ask my dogs. Even the pit bulls can’t handle being in my vicinity for too long and those dogs are usually the culprits that clear a room.
Along with the broccoli, I get to sample delicacies like raw almonds, lemon juice, baking soda and raw apple cider vinegar. Trust me, you have not lived until you have turned yourself in to a human science project and drink lemon juice with baking soda followed by an apple cider vinegar chaser. Remember those volcanoes kids used to make in high school? What a ridiculously odd sensation feeling that erupt in your gut. Blech.
All of this is with the hopes to raise my pH. Right now it is very low, probably due to the fact my diet used to be based on Lay’s potato chips and Diet Coke. And bacon. I miss bacon.
Appointment with the plastic surgeon today….